goat trail, now with 30% fewer trees!
March 5, 2010
Some people came and cut down a bunch of trees near the Monastery today. When I went over to take a few photos after work, there was a group of deer standing around the (now quiet) machinery, looking confounded. Of course they’re camera shy, so all you get is one tiny deer hiding in the shadows framed by the tree-ripper there. No, really, she’s there. Look harder.
Across the road the carnage was worse, and the steep, rocky little goat trail that the students walk (us middle aged old coots whose best years of cardiac health are behind us take the longer, more gently sloping path) is now a clearing big enough for a game day tailgate party. I can’t imagine what they might be building in such a spot, although there is a sewer at the top of the path. Where the path used to be, that is.
Phrases I need to work on saying less often, all of which show up here in my video narration, include:
1) adding “right now” onto the end of an otherwise perfectly finished sentence;
2) “. . . I tell you what” (picked up while living in Georgia, reinforced by a recent King of the Hill binge);
3) “Jesus Murphy”.
I’m clearly some kind of hayseed. At least I didn’t swear. Wait, is one of those a swear?
Posted by jodi on March 5, 2010 at 11.14pm
roll up the ripoff
March 1, 2010
On first glance I thought that perhaps Tim Hortons had, after all these decades, changed their colour scheme. But, no. This Country Style Donuts coffee cup is nothing but a dashing imposter, laying its glitzy colour scheme over the well known design of Tim Hortons’ nationally beloved and highly anticipatedRoll up the Rim. Here, have a look at how similar the design is:
photo by flickr user western tragedy
(for my non-Canadian friends: the other side of the Tims cup also has little black and white photos of the SUV and the television and whatever other stuff you can win on it. Just like the imposter cup).
Posted by jodi on March 1, 2010 at 11.28pm
i’ll show you mine
February 25, 2010
A comment thread on another website got me thinking: did I ever share my favourite pickup line story with y’all? I might have, but it’s short and sweet so here it is again anyway:
It was, I think, the summer of 1986; I was 14 years old and loitering around the playground of my old elementary school around 8:00 in the evening with a boy named Joe. Joe was a year or two older than me, 16 maybe. He hadn’t lived in our town long, having been recently shipped to the other parent while on probation for something about which I don’t know the details. The setting must have inspired him, because he suddenly, in the middle of an otherwise normal conversation, came out with the very juvenile suggestion “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours”. Then he whipped down his fly and displayed his junk, indistinct in the fading evening light and the shadow of the school building (thank goodness; teenager penis is something nobody ever needs to see). This was immediately followed by what is still one of the best lines I’ve ever heard: “Now that we’ve seen each other’s genitalia, maybe we should introduce them sometime?”. So smooth. Never mind that he hadn’t even seen mine.
Ever the deflector, I said “Don’t you have a curfew?”. To which he looked at his watch, swore, and lit off across the field and home.
In retrospect I’m surprised that boy even knew a big word like “genitalia”. And I wouldn’t be at all shocked to learn that he’d heard that line in a bad movie.
Posted by jodi on February 25, 2010 at 9.39am
tacos are happy to see me
February 19, 2010
Posted by jodi on February 19, 2010 at 5.42pm
and all i wanted was a cut and blow dry
February 18, 2010
Posted by jodi on February 18, 2010 at 10.06pm
found art
January 20, 2010
Found printmaking:
The license plate impression in the snowbank was much crisper when I noticed on the way into the grocery store on Sunday; by the time I returned with my camera on Tuesday, the warm (between -4 and 0°) weather had slushified it a bit. LET THIS BE A LESSON KIDS, always bring your camera with you everywhere, even if you’ve just barely dragged your arse out of your bedroom and covered your nakedness long enough to tag along with a free ride to the grocery store. You’d be totally kicking yourself if you went grocery shopping without your camera and there was something crazy and bloggable going on like, say, a dude bringing a high powered rifle shopping for no reason. Still, slushified or not I think we can I.D. the person who threw that Tims cup on the ground.
Found drawing:
Here’s hoping the tire tracks through J+L’s heart are just tire tracks, and not a metaphor for a DOOMED LOVE. Of course, this is the dead end of a road that leads to a university building so it’s safe to assume that J+L are fairly young, and aren’t all young loves DOOMED, really?
Posted by jodi on January 20, 2010 at 6.55pm
y’all are impatient
January 15, 2010
I’m tired. This new job is kicking my ass a little. My head hurts. Dollhouse is on tonight. You’ll get your goddam Manifest Destiny, and be certain it will be well smothered in juicy pink ham cubes. Be patient.
Posted by jodi on January 15, 2010 at 6.31pm
with each coffee its history*
January 13, 2010
I threw up.
*a direct translation of the trademarked French phrase which is the French version of the English phrase, also trademarked, with which I normally title these photos on flickr but won’t here because I’m askeered of big corporations.
Posted by jodi on January 13, 2010 at 9.58pm
it doesn’t matter where in Canada you go
January 9, 2010
There’s always something familiar looking about the scenery.
Posted by jodi on January 9, 2010 at 4.35pm
aretha’s magic hat
January 28, 2009
There’s something funny about that giant photo of last week’s presidential inauguration that I assume everybody in the world has seen by now.
Because it’s a composite image and not everyone sits still through long speeches, some heads in the audience are conflated, truncated or just plain screwy. It almost looks like some dude with a goatee is wearing Aretha’s hat, or like she’s got some kind of magical force that causes that fedora to float unsupported in front of her face (for some awesome kind of rock and roll reason, clearly, since it’s Aretha after all). I had hoped that such a remarkable and mystical image might finally reveal Dick Cheney’s hidden demonic nature for all to see, but sadly he’s still too crafty for that.
Sorry for the shabby photo quality; I haven’t figured out why I can’t get the “print screen” function to work properly on my new laptop, so I had to do it the old way: camera held up to the screen.
Posted by jodi on January 28, 2009 at 1.36pm
